I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
