The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
