Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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