We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
how drunk are you?
Several
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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