what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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