summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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