Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
