I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
