when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
