Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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