And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
