sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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