I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Randomize
