Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Me too!
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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