What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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