Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
