Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Randomize
