She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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