I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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