I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
