After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
