none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
