wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Randomize