just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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