so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Randomize
