doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
