Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
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