I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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