is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
