Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
false alarm, still single
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
