dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize