yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
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