just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Randomize
