Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Randomize
