where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
