I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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