your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Randomize
