My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
