Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Randomize
