hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Just cropdusted the office
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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