Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
