don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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