the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
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