Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
