belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
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