garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I am puke
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I need water and some morals
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
