i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
