good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
