They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
They took my balls.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
