using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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